I'll preface this with, I'm pretty fkn terrible when it comes to women.
That said, the game that must be played is fkn annoying.
I've got this thing for a girl I worked with over the summer. I made sushi with her last weekend. She's gonna be making dinner for me this week. However, last time I talked to her (getting advil for broken arm) she mentioned she was fighting with her boyfriend over text. This is the first time she's mentioned the boyfriend.
I'm not sure to take this as one of the following:
1. Hey I've got a boyfriend, chill
or
2. I've got a boyfriend, but make a move cause we're "fighting"
And, I'm not quite sure, but last time I talked to her, she ended with "Bye sweetie"
Needless to say, I'm completely fkn confused. Any of the ladies or (knowledgeable) guys have any advice or something to say.
_________________ I'm in your posts, stealing your quotes.
Theres one easy way to fix most issues with girls, dont think.
You can rattle your head around it all day but it will never solve anything. We can never know someones intentions unless they tell us, no amount of analyzing will come up with a certain answer. Its best to have dinner with her, have a good time and see what happens. If she makes a move, kool? If she doesn't, so be it.
Stop thinking about the outcomes and just enjoy what happens, whatever that is.
In my opinion, you're obviously in the friend zone. Just act normal for now until you see some obvious signs that she is attracted to you.
Worst case is that if she does break up with her boyfriend and immediately hook up with you, you'd be most likely used as a rebound.
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Ziegfried wrote:
What you do or say in any game is a small extension of who you really are. It's the anonymity that can allow them to show their true self, or who they would be if there was no "penalty" for their actions.
Don't throw yourself at her right now. See how it goes with her and her boyfriend, I would give it about a week. If it still seems shes dropping hints, sit her down and tell her how you feel. Mention that you didn't want to put too much on her mind bringing it up to her seeing how shes having relationship problems.
I know it sounds cliche. But if she isn't into you like that you could always be friends .
In my opinion, you're obviously in the friend zone. Just act normal for now until you see some obvious signs that she is attracted to you.
Worst case is that if she does break up with her boyfriend and immediately hook up with you, you'd be most likely used as a rebound.
rebound is if she is dumped not the other way round
Who ends the relationship doesn't matter. The point is if the person had a diffcult time with the person they really cared about in their previous relationship, they may quickly look for a new partner for comfort and to verify preconceived nototions on why the previous relationship failed(Usually through a confirmation bias that favors them.). After their emotional and mental states are back to normal through the help of their new partner, the attraction towards their new partner usually begins to fade.
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Ziegfried wrote:
What you do or say in any game is a small extension of who you really are. It's the anonymity that can allow them to show their true self, or who they would be if there was no "penalty" for their actions.
Joined: Jan 2006 Posts: 9544 Location: London, United Kingdom
well that can be the case but most people i know who end a relationship are ready for a new relationship long before they leave the person, in many cases they end up happier and with the other person for a lot longer
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Sry to say..But i believe your in the friendZone..and once your in there its really difficult to get out. I myself have ended up there on more than one occasion. The female is difficult to understand, they want what they cannot have. Ive tested this theory a couple times. I went to the bar and acted like a complete jerk to a couple girls and next thing you know they just wanted to hook up with me. Now you may not believe the above statement but ive asked some of my female friends(Which im 100% in the friendzone with)and they also said that there attracted to guys that they cannot have or guys which dont want them back. I was shocked when 3 out of the 5 girls i asked admitted to this and i quote "I Dont know why but it makes me want them more". This isnt all girls of course , but a decent majority.
My suggestion : Be straight up with her. Tell her how you feel. if you wait too long than youll be in the friendzone 100%.
"It is better to have love and lost to have never loved at all"
Joined: Jan 2007 Posts: 9841 Location: US - Illidan
friendzone. get over it.
She'll use you for comfort and lean on you when things are down. She'll flirt with you occasionally and when things are really bad with her BF she might even hook up with you. But you'll never be anything more than a friend who was always there for her. Thats it.
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